Stop Doing This to Get More Dates in 2020…

…and Write the Perfect First Message Instead

The New Year is right around the corner. And we believe in starting the new dating season on the right foot. All you need for a brand new start is the perfect first message. But how do you draft one? To help you out, we talked to our Sugar Babes and selected 4 big no-go’s in first messages. Those are the things you need to stop doing to get more dates in 2020. At the end, you will find our pro-tip on creating your first message. The right way.

But first, let’s start out by taking a look into what not to do.


1. Be too eager

I mean, it’s totally normal to be head over heels over a cute Sugar Baby. Make sure you don’t come across too eager though. If she doesn’t reply to your first message, don’t send a second or a third one. Instead, make sure that your first one is really good (more about that later). Also, don’t send her your phone number or email address. Especially not in the first message. Sugar Babes use our website because it guarantees them safety and makes them feel more comfortable. Don’t pressure them into giving this up. Instead, wait for her to propose it herself.


2. Copy/paste

Some sugar daddies simply copy/paste their messages to save time. Which can be understandable. Kind of. The problem is that she knows. If the message is very generic and doesn’t mention anything from her profile, it’s very obvious that you didn’t even have a look at it. One Sugar Baby told us that although her profile is in English, plenty of men have sent her the first message in their native languages. You can’t be more obvious than that… And that’s how you lose the chance to connect with the Sugar Baby who could have been your match.


3. Be average

When it comes to online dating, a plain ‘hi’ for the first message is not enough. Especially if you don’t have a profile picture. The truth is, when a Sugar Baby creates an account, she receives over 20 messages daily. She will never choose to answer a man who said ‘hi’ when she has multiple guys coming up with more creative messages. How to make your message better? Go to her profile! See what she writes in her profile description and what information she’s put out about herself. Refer to it in the first message you send her. Also, add something about yourself, tell her how you like to spend your free time, and what kind of dates you like. Make her interested in you.


4. Weird her out

As a Sugar Daddy, you’re probably more mature and more experienced. It’s also likely that you’ve been on our website for a while. But it might not be the case for her. Most likely, she’s new and she tries to figure out how the world of sugar dating works. By sending her messages like ‘hey, up for sugar?’ or ‘hey, wanna meet tonight?’, you might scare her off.  Instead, use your first few messages as a way to get to know her and what she’s like. Be curious and polite. Once you get to know each other a little bit better, propose a meeting. It’s much less likely that you’ll lose her on the way.


5. Our Pro Tip: The First Message

To sum up, that is how your first message should look like:

  • mention something from her profile
  • mention something about yourself (yes, you can copy/paste that part)
  • don’t overwhelm her
  • don’t rush her into moving onto another platform
  • don’t pressure her into meeting right away

Example message:

‘Hi Anna! You look really nice! I can see that you live in London. I’ve just came back from a business trip there and I have to say it’s a very lovely city. I visit it a few times a year 🙂

As for me, I like to spend my free time playing tennis, swimming, reading and cycling. Traveling is a big part of my life as well. I would love to meet someone who would travel with me and even if we meet locally, I would love to have someone who’s adventurous and open minded.

Let me know if that sounds interesting to you.’


We hope our and our Sugar Babies’ advice will prove to be useful. Keep in mind that having a quality profile will help you get more dates in 2020. Take a look at our tips here

SugarDaters wish you a wonderful year 2020. And many fun dates!