Sugar Advisor: Mono-poly SugarBaby

Mono-poly SugarBaby

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We all know that Sugar Dating is one of many unconventional types of relationships. But  let’s go a step further, would you share your Sugar Daddy or would you rather regard him as your “property”?

Polyamorous or Monogamous? Close or open? Jealous or trustful? We are all aware that there is a huge world of opportunities beyond the traditional values of marriage and monogamy. However, not everyone is daring to try what is usually tabooed in most societies. I tried both options, and here are my conclusions.

I tend to believe that the crucial thing in your relationship preferences are your origins. If traditional and religious values have accompanied you during all your childhood and youth, it is probably hard for you to go beyond the framework of monogamy. In most religions polygamy is unacceptable. From your youngest years, society’s norms have instilled in you a perfect image of marriage, education and lifestyle, along with belief that this is the only way to lead a successful life. You were probably never taught of  how boredom might slowly kill you, nor made aware of the joys of a fulfilling sexual life. As long as you have a loyal partner, there is nothing to worry about.

Some people choose staying in unsuccessful relationships because they feel safe and the vision of old age in solitude does not speak to them.

Do not get me wrong. I’m not against monogamy. I actually like to consider myself as a “mature monogamous” woman. However I don’t believe in marriage. I like the concept of receiving jewelry and I believe that life by the side of one partner is enormously satisfying. Trust, closeness and security are all we want in life. But then ”we” have to make all the decisions and life becomes an endless compromise. Complete dependence; living in symbiosis.

As I said, I consider myself a mature monogamist. There is a whole scale of monogamy. For some, jealousy is evoked by a look, for others a touch or initiation of an intimate connection with a third person. I would place myself on the edge of the monogamous scale because my deep feelings are settled on one person who has an untouchable place in my heart. I reserve that special kind of intimacy for this one partner. However, I like discovering sexuality on my own and I am open to exploring physicality with other people and even let someone into our relationship when the time is right. It’s the feeling of uniqueness with a dose of spice.

There are many shades of polyamory. It exists in many different forms: having an intimate primary partner along with many different sexual partners or living in a poly household. A transition from monogamy comes gradually with desperation and urge to explore as the main driving factors. Some individuals are clearly unable to be polyamorous. It shouldn’t be a constant struggle destroying you from the inside. For some, being open to other partners is natural – in line with their instincts. For others, it’s an obstacle and a challenge. However, there are many benefits of being open. Polyamory removes the pressure that one person must meet all of the individual’s needs. Emotional, sexual and intellectual desires can be met by other partners too. Non-possessiveness, communication, and trust are the keys to successful polyamory.

Yours truly,

Sugar Advisor

You are always welcome to write Oliwia at oliwia.misiak@gmail.com or send a direct message to @SugarAdvisor on Facebook.

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